Are you feeling stir crazy yet? Join the club. These are very trying times right now for all of us. While the initial downtime was a nice respite, the uncertainty about what lies ahead keeps us feeling antsy and out of sorts. This will be unchartered territory for most of us attempting to work virtually as our kids attempt to learn remotely. It will take grace and patience for all of us. As with most hard situations in life, when we can step back and look at the big picture, we can see the important life lessons we are learning along the way. In addition, we are reminded of important personal and family values that can guide us during these times of struggle and sacrifice.

 Here are some life lessons we can learn for ourselves and teach our children through this trying time:

 1.      Not everything is about us. This has been a constant conversation in our house the last few years as we are raising tweens and teens. Right now, we are all being called to sacrifice some of our comforts and freedoms for the greater good. Sure, we can individually assess our own personal vulnerabilities and risk factors for exposure to the coronavirus and adjust our actions accordingly. But, this isn’t about us. Our choices and our actions directly impact those more vulnerable, as well as the people who love and take care of those more vulnerable than us. That is a lot of people. As parents, we have been unpopular with our kids lately as we have made them comply with the restrictions of social gatherings and social distancing urged (and pleaded) by top officials in our government and medical community. Our opinions on the necessity of the restrictions are irrelevant right now. Generations before us have had to sacrifice in unimaginable ways to protect our country, our rights, and our freedoms. We can set an example for our kids that when we hear the message that this is the sacrifice we need to make as Americans for the greater good of our communities, country, and our world, we are going to do it, period.   

2.     Trimming the Fat in our Daily Lives. While I am keenly aware that this is not the case for a large number of Americans, many of our families live in a world of excess. Many of our kids have access to full pantries of food, unlimited stores, supplies, and social opportunities to keep them entertained. As we have stayed home and simplified our lives a bit, we have to stretch our resources. We have to be more resourceful with our food and simplify our schedules. We have to find more creative ways to fill our downtime. It is a helpful reminder that we have all that we need in simple things. Anything more can be nice but unnecessary too. There is a peace that comes from stripping some of the material comforts away and focusing on the needs that are most important. 

3.     Mother Nature can be a powerful healer. When we are feeling claustrophobic and trapped in our homes and all of the family dynamics that can go with it, a little sunshine and fresh air go a long way. For those of us in Texas, this time of isolation comes at the right time of year with beautiful spring weather. Not only are we able to reap the intrinsic benefits of connecting with nature, but we are also reminded of our obligation to do our part in protecting our earth. It is humbling to see how different parts of our earth have responded to the reduction in pollution, smog levels, and travel. When our lives and industries come back to life after this time of respite, we need to feel the burden to do our part to ensure that we are protecting the earth, the water, the air, and the animals that make Mother Nature so powerful. Go sit outside. Take a walk. Plant some flowers. You will feel better.

4.      The Beauty of a Broken Heart. It is so easy to get self-absorbed in our day-to-day lives. We are just so busy and distracted. Sometimes it takes a crisis of some kind to open our eyes and our hearts to our broken world. We have always tried to teach our kids to lean into issues and causes that break their hearts. This is what wakes us up to our greater purpose in serving our world with the gifts we have been given. When you become aware of suffering going on in our world, and you are praying for mercy and protection for your loved ones and for people that you will never meet, your heart not only breaks but is filled with compassion and conviction for the greater good. We are all connected to each other, and it is so important to be reminded of our shared humanity. Every single one of us has a duty to share our unique gifts in a way that makes the world a better place. Let’s open ourselves up to exploring what that might be. Listen to the subtle nudges to check in on a friend, to support a neighbor, to financially contribute to an important cause, or any other nudge you feel. The world needs all of us right now. If you need an example of what this might look like, search for the videos taken in Italy where neighbors open their windows while in isolation and collectively play music and sing hymns together. But before you do, grab some tissue first! It is both heartbreaking and beautiful. Brainstorm as a family what you can do to encourage those around you. Send a thank-you note to your pediatrician or any other doctors and nurses you may know to thank them for the work they do. Send cards or artwork to a local nursing home or hospital. Make a funny video and send it to family and friends. Collect extra supplies and drop them off on the porch of a neighbor that needs them. Donate blood. Lean into the needs of those around you, and you will be better because of it.

5.     Nothing Replaces Relationships – Not even technology. We miss our people. We miss our friends and our community. We miss our colleagues, our peers, our neighbors, and our teachers. We are only a little over a week into this social distancing gig, and we are already yearning to spend time with more of our people. Technology and the communication it offers us have been a lifesaver. We can call and text and FaceTime our friends and family. Social media keeps us up to date on the general pulse of our relationships and neighborhoods. Most churches are live streaming their services, and classrooms are offered in a virtual format. While all of this keeps us connected on some level, nothing replaces good face-to-face time and interaction. Technology can never replace that. As adults, most of us have learned this for ourselves along the way. But, many kids and teenagers are starting to understand that too. I think we will all feel a greater sense of gratitude just being in the physical presence of others. We are wired for connection, and our relationships are a fundamental factor in our physical and emotional health.

6.     Work and School is a Luxury we often take for granted. We can all do our share of moaning and groaning about the monotony of our daily work and school lives. However, when these things are taken away, it is easy to see all of the little things we take for granted in our daily pre-corona lives. During this break from school, our kids might initially celebrate the break from the traditional school schedule. However, it won’t take long before they miss the structure, the social interaction, the predictability of the learning process, the sports and activities, and the clear expectations from their teachers. For those of us that are having to work from home, it is easy to miss the comforts of an office and all the perks that go along with it. Right now, there are so many concerns about the financial state of our country as a result of the shutdowns. Job security can feel fragile, and the unknown creates anxiety. I think we will all appreciate our getting a sense of normalcy back in our lives. Predictability and stability sound pretty good right now.

7.     Protect your sense of humor- no matter what. Anxiety and fear are masters at sucking the joy and the humor out of our lives. Anxiety makes everything feel like the stakes are dangerously high. Fight this. The world and our lives can be really hard and really funny at the same time. Social media has provided hilarious memes that have brought humor and light into the toughest of situations. It also connects us to the shared experiences we are all feeling like our lives and our families are turned upside down. Keep laughing, and do not abandon your sense of humor. Your life and your relationships will be better because of it. A good sense of humor does not make all the hard stuff go away, but it sure makes it more manageable.

 8.      Embrace Downtime and Learn to Rest.   Most of our day-to-day lives are super busy. Between full calendars of work, family, parenting, and social obligations, downtime can be hard to come by. We live in a culture that promotes non-stop productivity and multi-tasking. It can be hard to indulge in rest and relaxation without feeling guilty. Ironically, this is the very thing we need to take care of ourselves physically, emotionally, and spiritually. Work to embrace the downtime of this time of isolation. Let go of the guilt and just let it be. Take a nap. Work a puzzle. Watch a movie. Go for a walk. It will be good for the soul.

We are all in this together. We can learn ways to embrace flexibility and be creative in how we take care of ourselves and our families. We can slow down enough to be intentional in modeling for our families how to make the best of a very difficult time. Let’s lean into each other and do our part to bring hope and laughter into a time of stress and anxiety. All for one and one for all. We will get through this together and hopefully learn a lot along the way.